Black Santro, Sleezy comments , sounds familiar ??

Ashutosh : A small town boy, with dreams to succeed in this Big City"

Where I live in Fatehgarh ( Uttar Pradesh ) is a very famous road of my town. Famous in a number of ways, one of them is that, it has many educational coaching centre’s, varying from high school to masters level. Because of so many young people around the place is a rather happening one.

I was standing in front of my house, waiting for my friend, just hanging around, Boys standing in groups of two and four, wearing stylish goggles puffing cigarettes and chewing pan masala, acting cool. On the other side a group of girls, may be a dozen returning home from the coaching classes, On two Scotties and eight or nine bicycles, and all of them walking slowly, cracking jokes and laughing and all. Suddenly a black Santro car sped towards the group, the driver applies brakes just in front of the girls, makes a cut, one of the many boys sitting inside the car says something to a girl, and the driver reverses the car and flee the spot with top speed. I saw the boys giving high five to each other inside the car. The girls were shocked but not afraid. Now the topic of their discussion changed to, who were they and how to teach them a lesson and how to avoid this in future? In a matter of minutes, mobile phones (which are one of the latest trends) were ringing everywhere. Boys were blaming each other, some were scolding the others and some were consoling them. In meanwhile the main accused were nowhere to there. What happened later I don’t know, but such a thing never happened again.

Now, what was that?

Just think about it.

Some thoughts came to my mind.

Girls can and should take stern steps to retaliate any attack either verbal or physical they should not keep it to themselves and speak immediately. Men as fathers and elder brothers can help the young of family by setting examples for them to follow by giving respect and care to their mothers, wives, sisters, and daughters. Family is an important institution parents as our guides.

Hope I could convey my thoughts and hope we can bring about change in these simple yet complicated relations.

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

‘मर्दों की एक ही जाति होती है...’

अरविंद दास : बिहार में जन्मे अरविंद दास मीडिया रिसर्चर और पत्रकार हैं! दिल्ली केंद्रीय ठीकाना!

फ़ैज़ अहमद फ़ैज़ की एक कविता की पंक्तियाँ हैं! बोल के लब आज़ाद हैं तेरे/ बोल जबां अब तक तेरी है...

मुझे यह कविता बेहद पसंद है! पर जब मैं अपने आस-पड़ोस और देश-दुनिया पर नज़र डालता हूँ तो वर्षों पहले लिखी ये पंक्तियाँ एक साथ कई अर्थ लेकर मेरे सामने प्रस्तुत होती है! इस कविता में एक ओर अपने समय का साक्षात्कार है तो दूसरी ओर सब कुछ कह देने का आवाह्न!

दक्षिण एशियाई समाज में हाशिए पर रहने वालों, विशेष कर स्त्रियों के लिए आजादी अब भी संविधान में लिखे ‘कुछ शब्द’ भर हैं! जबान हैं, पर कहने की आज़ादी कहाँ!

पिछले दशकों में मीडिया के मार्फत भारतीय समाज में अस्मिता विमर्श काफी सुनाई पड़ता रहा हैं! इस विमर्श में स्त्रियों के सशक्तीकरण, लैंगिक समानता की अनूगूंज हैं! पर यह विमर्श शहरी सार्वजनिक दुनिया (पब्लिक स्फ़ीयर) तक ही सीमित और सिमटी हुई दिखती है!

मिथिला के एक गाँव मैं मेरा बचपन बीता. उस सामंती समाज के ताने-बाने में स्त्रियों की दशा की ना तो कोई चिंता है और ना ही उसे तोड़ने की कोई पहल. गाँव छोड़ कर जो शहर आ गए और जिनके पास सांस्कृतिक पूंजी और साधन हैं, उनमें स्त्रियों के अधिकारों की चेतना आई है पर किस हद तक वह फलीभूत हो रहा है यह कहना मुश्किल है!

आजादी के 63 वर्षों के बाद भी उस समाज में सवर्ण स्त्रियों के लिए लैंगिक भेदभाव एक अभिशाप है, वहीं दलित स्त्रियों के लिए यह दोहरा अभिशाप!

मैं एक स्त्रीवादी (फेमेनिस्ट) हूँ और स्त्रियों पर होने वाली सभी प्रकार की हिंसा की घोर निंदा करता हूँ. पर जब मैं रोज़ स्त्रियों के साथ होने वाले हिंसा की खबरें देखता-पढ़ता हूँ तो सोचता हूँ कि कहीं ना कहीं इसमें मेरी भी भागेदारी है!

‘भारतीय समाज भले ही कई जातियों में बँटा हो पर मर्दों की एक ही जाति होती है’, मेरी एक दोस्त कहा करती थी. वह ठीक ही कहती थी...

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

Fight of living

Prajakta " I write my subjective view of life and do not mean to cause damage due to any inaccuracies in my writing and/or thoughts "

..It’s the electricity charging our lives to survive in a city like Mumbai. You can feel it when you just try to get into a local train at 8a m! There is always a buzz of an incessant struggle fueled by fear of the competition, driven against the sheer magnitude of people around us…

Personalizing violence and the reasons: I end up in a fight almost every day because it is otherwise impossible to go on as me if I do not raise my voice and tell someone to shut up or get out of my face/space. Our natural behaviour is not of herd mentality, it is to show our uniqueness. Even violence has that as a cause. Today we use ‘existence’ or ‘intellectual dialogue’ as a reason for our intolerant fits-may it be some incoherent rants about people from another region or a supposed nonviolent struggle against a bad government. Now, we all know that aggression is not a new emotion, it’s natural. As natural as our basic instinct to grope at the attractive, fire up our organs against that which is sexually stimulating and to use all physical strength to destroy that which we hold as our opponent.

I am sure that makes you red in the face thinking. “We are not animals! We are humans. We are better than that!” But really, are we? Who are we to claim ourselves above animals if we know-understand-witness right and wrong and still choose to walk away?

‘Gender based’ violence: You mean the beating, torturing, abusing, molesting, raping and killing of women by men and women both?

This is just a part of the whole; a part where the receiver of this violence happens to be a woman and not another man, a child or an animal. Yes, I do believe that the perpetrator does not have rational control over his/her actions in violence against another. A pre mediated crime of violence against a particular woman in a specific context is also such a crime. I do appreciate you trying to focus on women and violence against women, but to what extend?

Pressures are breaking backs and there will be a spark, a fight or a crime. I am not justifying crime. I am telling you that it is as natural as the good in world. Do you plan to eradicate Crime? This is a social reality, a problem with roots too deep not a disease with a miracle cure or vaccination. But we can resist violence or we can prevent it! Whose responsibility is it to be the agents of this change? The masses? Men? And out of that only a select few educated-conscious men who are strong enough to act? That’s a dangerously low number friend and being someone who has been there and taken it-am dubious. In a world of all inclusive, why start something exclusive? Are you proposing some distinctive actions that only men can perform and hence you have a separate blog for it? Or is it to make women aware that MEN are suddenly interested in saving us? I only do not understand the purpose of this exclusivity. I could engage further if it was action for all against violence against women!

What I want to suggest is to use preventive methods to aid someone in trouble, (if you are looking for a word of advice from someone who could not tolerate the dark side alone being a single woman, a social worker and having worked for a similar cause in Bundelkhand, Jhansi/Orccha).

• Give aid to those who cannot help themselves. Make people aware of ‘violence’ and its repercussions to all of us.
• ‘Mera kya jaata’ attitude will remain until and unless you cannot propose to show that the witnessed action could be curbed with the smallest interference
• And by removing the fear of that violence being redirected towards the mediator/interferer.

Work towards making the government law enforcement agencies-agents and Social work groups CAPABLE of not only aiding those in need, but doing so keeping in mind that the one seeking aid is the victim requiring consistent counselling and care.

On a personal note, as a teacher my role is to then teach equality in gender and everything in and around it-BECAUSE it is the only source of a uniform, disciplined life skills training available to all. We can campaign, use media and make it known, make people aware of the consequences of their actions and never seize…

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

Same hurdles and obstacles...

Aprajita : an independent funloving quirky girl, going through a crazy world with a big smile on her face

In the year 1950, the Constitution of India came into existence and declared that men and women are equal and also prohibited any kind of discrimination against women...I mention this so as to ask what does this convey to you?

That men and women are equal? Is it not? really??? So then why this whole talk about emancipation and upliftment and rights of women!!! because the fact of the matter is that since then till now nothing has changed, same hurdles and obstacles....nothing much has been done, in this so called equal society women are being assaulted, molested, raped and abused and all this is being done in a way too casual manner..have we ever realised what is the real problem at the grass root level, well if you ask me, its not the men who need to be taught it’s the women who need to change.

NO battle was ever won by sitting and brooding at home, And yes the current society we live in is no less than a battlefield where we need to fight it out everyday, well not exactly with our kitchen knives or pepper sprays but with our smart wit, our sharp presence of mind and above all our courage, our courage to speak up, our courage to stand up for the women around us, our sheer courage to correct and teach our sons that how they should behave, if every wife resolves to tell her husband that she will not put up with his crap, if every girl friend turns around and tells her boyfriend that he is behaving like a jerk, if every mother(and i mention this in caps)teaches her son that he is/must treat women with respect, and if every sister can explain to her brother how humiliated she feels when she is letched at or when the boys in the neighborhood or his friends pass lewd remarks at her.....men too are sensitive creatures, it is just that we let them go astray, and the reason for that is our faulty education wherein we as women are taught early in life that our greatest worth in the world is HOW WE SOOTHE....and we tend to take this way too literally, tell me honestly all you women, how many times has it happened with you that you have found yourself in struggling situations ,where people were being unreasonable, crossed a line, but you instead of putting an end to it, of making a noise about it, choose to put up with it, kept quiet about it, instead kept shoving your hand saying Here! Here! Here! With plain desperation in your voice.......WAKE UP!!!!!

No you are not super heroes sworn to serve, and yes you have a choice, we all do...We all, each one of us are powerful in our own ways, we all in our small and little ways can make a difference..we dont always have to look for a support system, rather we can be somebody’s support, so next time when your maid comes home and tells you that her husband beats her up, don’t just listen to her tale with mock interest rather collect ten people from your neighborhood and go and confront that man, this is just an example...If we all do our bit only then this concept of "one voice" will be achieved.....Having a safe society for women is not an unachievable task, it’s just that men are way too casual and women way too scared...SPEAK UP AND LOUD!

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

The more I Understand , The more I want to Change !

Vikram ' Trying to understand the reasons for Gender based violence and trying to change mind sets '

This is my first attempt at writing a blog piece .I am Vikram Sheoran, working as a web manager in CSR. I have completed my master’s in computer administration from Hisar, Haryana. I started my career as a web developer 4 year ago.

When I started work in Delhi I never tried to find anything other than a desk job. Me , my desk , my machine coding and decoding the world wide web. I joined Centre For Social Research in the beginning of 2010. I started working as a developer. I didn’t know that what exactly is CSR did ? I didn’t even know that what NGO’s do?

After spending 6 months , I started realizing the hardships faced by women in Delhi. Why Delhi is called crime capital? What is eve teasing, Domestic Violence, Female Foeticide? And most importantly what is Gender? I got to know why people say Delhi is not safe for women. Although I had heard about these issues in news papers so many times, I never reacted.

Gradually I realized how big these problems are. CSR is the place where I learnt how important GENDER sensitization is? I have seen so many cases in CSR where women come with their problems. How they are facing these problems? All I can say that now I understand a bit of these issues.

Sometimes I participate in gender training in corporates/slums/schools. During these trainings we talk about various social evils like domestic violence, eve teasing, dowry, female foeticide and many others. Whenever I get a chance I talk about these problems. I have joined many demonstrations for women rights and eve teasing.

I feel there should be strict law ,strong bills and their implementation to ensure women feel safe and secure in their homes ,social and professional spaces.

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

Man enough to love a woman then be a man and respect a woman!

Raja Sharma : "An honestly simple yet complicated entertainer trying to figure out the paradox of our times "

Varanasi - New Delhi - Bombay. The three cities which I connect to and have spent almost equal amount of my 27 years of life. And whenever asked by even the marathi speaking dons of bombay(i mean c’mon its bombay not mumbai) i have always said the samething: Banaras mein Dhaam hai, Bumbai mein kaam hai lekin Dilli Meri Jaan hai.....and the words have barely left my tongue in the proudest of baritones my throat can create that i am almost looked down upon for associating myself with so much passion to a city known more for shutting down by 8pm than even the corrupt politicians that have made it their head quarters.

Yes the Capital is not safe!

And yes its because of most us. Lighting a candle in protests is good but thats not really the solution. A march or a protest for a rape victim who has even lost her life to the hooligans that walk the street is a sign of showing your support towards the victim. iss tareekay sey hum bimaar ka ilaaj kar rahein hain, bimaari kaa nahin!

Even Bombay or a Pune at times is not safe. But there is never a sense of fear amongst the ladies in these cities to take a walk past 11 pm.

Everytime a jerk letches at a G.K. 1 M-block market dont ignore him.....dont go fight him(though that would fix all the problems...but gandhiji wouldnt like it J )...i say letch back..make him embarrased. I know its always easier said then done...but i see it here in bombay. No one dares to treat a girl in a market space in such a manner.

Lets not forget even the pujaari's in the temple often suggest ki MAATAA KI pooja karo. For the simple reason that maataa ko manaanaa asaan hai, bajrang bali ko nahin.

So please..if you are man enough to love a woman then be a man and respect a woman! And if I have failed to make my point clear then in pure and simple words : A Safer city is a Sexier City !!

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

Time to speak up , Man.........

By Amitabh Kumar, Head of Media and Communication at Centre for Social Research and one of CSR’s gender trainers

It was 21:43 I had just finished dinner when I got a call from a Scottish friend of mine , usually her voice is full of life , positivity but tonight she sounded threatened , so much fear in her voice. She informed me that she was in an auto rickshaw on the ‘ Nelson Mandela Road ‘ and the driver who had been acting sleazy was slowing down in a dark patch, she was scared to death . I told her to be on the phone with me as I rushed to her. I live in J.N.U so was superbly close , as I raced my car to get to her, there was so much fear in me.

What if something happens to her ?
Should I ask her to call the cops ?
Should I ask friends in vasant kunj to get there ?
What am I supposed to do once I get there ?
Do I go all Rambo on the rickshaw driver and beat him to death ?
What if he is stronger or has a knife or a gun ?

Racing through the nelson mandela marg , almost getting into 2 accidents , I saw her standing in front of the b11 market , she was safe ! She got in the car I dropped her home. Afraid for all my other friends who commute at night , furious at bastards who do not respect women , and ashamed at how little I do to change the scenario I drove back.

I have spoken to many people about it since that night ,almost every one said ‘ well she should have not been taking an auto all alone after it gets dark’. The more I heard this answer the more it troubled me , half of my city lives in constant fear of the other half . And we instead of fighting back instead of saying lets find that auto rickshaw driver , put him in jail , beat him up , ensure he never drives an auto again , say ‘ DO NOT TAKE AN AUTO ALONE WHEN IT GETS DARK !!!!

We defend the guilty and blame the victim. With all honesty I hope I had told her note down the number of the auto , in my fear and first instinct of protection it did not occur to me, similarly I think it does not occur to us that avoiding this problem has lead it to take the epidemic dimensions it has today.

So why do I pen down all these thoughts ??

Because I believe its only by being able to express ourselves we can get to the next step of acting on it. So many times we feel so strongly about things but never express it because its not cool/not what people like to hear / cause we are not sure what we did was right or wrong.

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol. 

Safe Public Transport System Makes Cities More Accessible for Women

Safe Public Transport System Makes Cities More Accessible for Women : "In Delhi nothing is safe... not an auto, bus, not even the metro!"

These were opinions voiced by young, professional women in Delhi last year during a discussion organised by JAGORI, a women's training, documentation and resource centre in the city. Of course, the recent announcement by Delhi Metro - that one coach on all its trains will be reserved for women has been greeted with obvious relief by women commuters.

Is Delhi Safe for Women?

Is Delhi Safe for Women? No it is not. But then it never was. I have lived all my life in Mumbai. The image of Delhi was always that of a city extremely unsafe for women. I grew up hearing that. As a Mumbaikar, I always had this bias against Delhi and particularly the men in Delhi. Could not bring myself to take up a job in Delhi or get married to a guy from Delhi. Simply because of its negative reputation as far as safety is concerned.....

Spreading the Message

Donald Graham, Intern and writer at the Centre for Social Research

Drivers in Delhi stopping to fill up their tanks yesterday were asked to ‘Stand up for Safe Delhi’ as part of a major new campaign organised by CSR.

Flyer's and stickers were distributed at 2 busy South Delhi petrol stations by volunteers as part of the new campaign aimed at changing attitudes towards violence against women in the capital. Stopping and talking to a large number of drivers, passer-byes and auto-wallahs, volunteers, with owner’s permission, stuck eye-catching stickers onto cars and autos.

The campaign represents a new movement in Delhi, as volunteers and concerned citizens are brought together online to make a stand for safety in the city. The group has already attracted a large number of supporters through social networking sites and hopes to engage even more people in the future.

Working to help make Delhi a safer place for women, the group was established after shocking reports of violence against women became an daily feature of life in Delhi. They have called for more people to stop standing by and start helping out when they see a women being harassed or harmed.

For more information and to get involved with the group check out the Facebook group here I Stand For Safe Delhi and the website makedelhisafe.blogspot.com

2nd Successful Flash Mob on Delhi Metro

Donald Graham, Intern and writer at the Centre for Social Research

As Delhi commuters rushed home on Friday, eager to start their weekends, many were faced with what will hopefully be an increasingly common sight on the Metro: Lines of yellow t shirts, lines of people making a stand for respect.

On Friday the 6th of May Delhi Metro saw the 2nd ‘flash mob’ organised by ‘Mend the Gap’, a group of volunteers brought together to fight harassment on the Metro and promote gender equality in public spaces.

The movement was started by a small group of determined individuals who, after being stared at and harassed and seeing their friends being molested, decided that it was time for people to learn to respect their fellow passengers, share spaces and not just ‘mind the gap’ but ‘mend the gap’.

This was the 2nd in what will hopefully be a long series of ‘flash mobs’ to bring the problem to wider attention and push for change. Over 40 agents donned yellow t shirts with colourful slogans such as ‘Real Men Respect Women’ and ‘Share Don’t Stare’ before lining up for thousands of passengers to see at Rajiv Chowk, Yamuna Bank and other Blue Line stations. Many passengers asked questions, took photos on their camera phones and expressed support for the initiative.

The non-violent protest brings the issue of public safety and women’s spaces to the attention of thousands of commuters. With more and more women living independent lives and working away from home, many face uncomfortable journeys around the city as they commute. Simply getting home after work should not be an added trial at the end of a long day. Men should be able to share public spaces with women without subjecting them to stares, groping, harassment and assault.

As these volunteers continue to work for a safer, more comfortable Metro for everyone, we must all also work to ensure that Delhi is a safe city where everyone can work, travel, play and live their lives without fear.

To find out more about the protest, check out these blog posts at Being Abhi and Bell Bajao.

Also be sure to ‘Like’ Mend the Gap on Facebook so you can find out where and when the next flash mob will be. Together, with more people getting involved, we can all help make the Delhi Metro safer for everyone.

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/people

Roundabouts in Delhi: A safer Delhi

Roundabouts in Delhi: A safer Delhi: "The other evening I was waiting on the metro platform at Central Secretariat on the women only section of the platform. It was around 9.30pm so there were only a few other women on the platform and a gradually increasing crowd of men sandwiched up together on the other side of the barrier. As the crowd of men increased, a few of the men nearest to the barrier defiantly walked round to the women’s section. Whistling and shuffling their feet as they did so, pretending they’d accidentally strayed onto the giant pink platform markings, they were mainly emboldened by the fact that the number of women was few and they were mostly younger women. As they edged their way across I could see them casting sideways glances at me and the other women stood around me. It might have seemed harmless enough but it made my blood start to boil. ..."

Sexual Harassment: Do Women Really Ask for It?

Came across this write up from Komal , on makeupandbeauty.com , many times when our team discusses sexual harassment at public spaces , One does here a few mummers in the crowd going "Well they asked for it !!, She was wearing a miniskirt, She was smoking, She was Drinking, She was out alone late at night !!"

Read more .... Sexual Harassment: Do Women Really Ask for It?

@Ashmita: Can Delhi Be Ever Safe for Women...

The periodic incidents of crime against women are brought to light (thanks to the hounding media!) and then goes into oblivion as our content thirsty journalism fends another 'BREAKING NEWS' to rise its TRP. But where do we Delhi women stand ?...We are left as unsafe and as unsecured as we were from decades (if we may say)

Being the capital city of India and the city with the maximum security systems, why can't women in Delhi go out on the streets with pride and dignity. Why do we always have to be scared of the 'unseen' danger stalking us? Read more ......

Is Delhi safe for women ??

Is Delhi safe for women is a question doing the rounds these day. News channels, newspapers, social networking sites, drawing room conversations. It's all over.

I am from Delhi, I am a woman and I think Delhi is as safe for women as any other place in India or around the world. Is there any one place in the world where you can say a woman is safe? I think not! Read more ......

Will chilli sprays make delhi safe ?

In reference to an article which appeared in HT , Delhi police has taken up an initiative of how to make chilli spray at home. They are distributing pamphlets and empty spray bottles across the city. Will this really make the city safe ?? Will offenders not react with harsher methods ? Throwing acid back ? Are the comments by the Deputy commissioner of police Chhaya Sharma , "Increasing Police presence did not help "portraying a rather helpless picture of the Police ??

What do you think about it ?
Do you Agree ?
Will we speak our mind ?
Or stay silent ?
Thats what most Delhieits do , when they see violence against women , they keep quite !!
Shy Away !!
Stay Blind to it !!

What’s wrong with Delhi men…?

Ask any woman ! Go on… take the challenge. Regardless of age, shape,size , temperament or any other factor, Delhi men unabashedly, lewdly ogle women . Any woman. The visual assault begins at the airport itself with lecherous loaders giving every female passenger the prolonged once –over. Up down ,up down…stop at the breasts, and go on leering. Bags on the console can keep spinning, but that does not bother these awful chaps. In any case, for all its cosmetic merits ( barring the spectacularly hideous carpet), the fancy terminal 3 is a nightmare for weary travelers who are forced to trudge a couple of kilometers before they get to their gates or the parking lot. If the traveler happens to be a single woman, chances are she’ll trigger off a familiar response - men will instinctively grab their crotches.It is a reflex action. If the crotch- grabbing does not grab the marked female’s attention, they’ll sidle up to her and ask , “Taxi? Hotel?” Since there is never a cop or security guard in sight, the female under scrutiny will be forced to handle the situation any which way she can. Ignoring these men is a bit too subtle. Challenging them involves a prolonged exchange of angry words, besides attracting some more men who ‘join the fun’. So, the woman is forced to quicken her pace , look straight ahead and march on, hoping it ends there. Once she reaches her car, it’s the driver’s turn to stare shamelessly through the well positioned rear view mirror. His job is to ask, “Water? Cold towel? Newspaper?” if it’s a hotel pick up. In Delhi, they take the word ‘pick up’ very literally! If you indicate your total unwillingness to engage in any form of conversation,the driver starts humming old , romantic Bollywood songs and smiling to himself. So much for interaction with strangers on arrival in the Capital.

Once you get to your meeting, the organizers behave in an equally strange way, unless you know them well. The first assumption is that Mumbai women are ‘bold’ ( yes, of course we are bold, but not in the way implied). This so-called boldness means they’ll invite you to join a room full of the most dead boring, idiotically pompous and foolishly opinionated fellows who are busy name dropping in the most childish way. If you look obviously unimpressed, they assume your mind is on shopping or partying. They turn to you and ask in ‘jovial’ tone, “So….. how’s Mumbai?” It’s such an absurd ,time-pass question. As if Mumbai is an individual and one can provide a health report (“Not doing too well…. kuch sardi-bukhaar problem…change of weather…. vaisey, theek thaak…”). Everybody converses mainly in Hindi, and the few women present stick to ‘safe’ topics – ‘Kya haal hai?’ Nobody waits for an answer. They are far too busy looking over your shoulder to spot some big shot mantri walking in with an entourage. If a bonafide VVIP does arrive, all hell breaks loose and protocol is promptly forgotten as the scramble to get ‘face time’ with the person begins in earnest. If that person is Sheila Dixit or one of the Gandhis, the crowd goes orgasmic. Full blown chamchagiri takes over…. and that’s your cue to beat it!

This appeared in Bombay Times....

My life, experience & understanding by Amrita Anand

Came across this blog , says alot about the importance of making the city Delhi safe !!

my life, experience & understanding by Amrita Anand

Stand up for safe Delhi!

We are convinced that the violence taking place in Delhi is a matter of personal responsibility. How could it be that people who are witnessing violence are turning their eyes away? What we need is to make people aware about what is going on right in front of their eyes. I stand for a safe Delhi wants to change mindsets and get people to care about women’s safety in their city. Get involved and be part of it! We are looking for volunteers who are sharing our concerns and want to take action!

I stand for safe Delhi is a campaign initiated by the Centre for Social Research which is working since over three decades on the issue of gender equality.

Why is Delhi the rape capital of India?

The number of cases of rape reported nationwide has grown at an alarming rate: from 15,031 cases in 1998, to 18,233 in 2004 and a shocking 21,397 in 2009. Delhi has seen the number of cases of rape reported dip since a high of 658 in 2005, but it remains the location of more than double the number of rapes than in other Indian cities, including Mumbai (182), Bhopal (117), and Jabalpur (76).

How can we account for such rises in the number of cases besides a better reporting and more women feeling comfortable enough to come forward?

• Urban migration?
• Skewed sex ratios due to female foeticide?
• A low level of convictions for those accused of rape?
• Low number of police?
• Lack of sexual education?

No Gender Equality without men!

In international contrast Indian men attest poorly on issues of gender equality - that´s the outcome of the survey IMAGES (International Men and Gender Equity Survey) published by the International Center for Research on Women (ICRW) on time with the International Women´s Day 2011.

Gender equality cannot be achieved without men taking a major part in the combat. This comprehension has become an incontrovertible evidence of the emancipation movement internationally during the last decades. Social change aiming at enhancing conditions for women in all societal sectors needs the engagement of men, who are - as a matter of fact - still the major decision makers and hence present the most influential powers in many societies.