Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Fight of living

Prajakta " I write my subjective view of life and do not mean to cause damage due to any inaccuracies in my writing and/or thoughts "
..It’s the electricity charging our lives to survive in a city like Mumbai. You can feel it when you just try to get into a local train at 8a m! There is always a buzz of an incessant struggle fueled by fear of the competition, driven against the sheer magnitude of people around us…

Personalizing violence and the reasons: I end up in a fight almost every day because it is otherwise impossible to go on as me if I do not raise my voice and tell someone to shut up or get out of my face/space. Our natural behaviour is not of herd mentality, it is to show our uniqueness. Even violence has that as a cause. Today we use ‘existence’ or ‘intellectual dialogue’ as a reason for our intolerant fits-may it be some incoherent rants about people from another region or a supposed nonviolent struggle against a bad government. Now, we all know that aggression is not a new emotion, it’s natural. As natural as our basic instinct to grope at the attractive, fire up our organs against that which is sexually stimulating and to use all physical strength to destroy that which we hold as our opponent.

I am sure that makes you red in the face thinking. “We are not animals! We are humans. We are better than that!” But really, are we? Who are we to claim ourselves above animals if we know-understand-witness right and wrong and still choose to walk away?

‘Gender based’ violence: You mean the beating, torturing, abusing, molesting, raping and killing of women by men and women both?

This is just a part of the whole; a part where the receiver of this violence happens to be a woman and not another man, a child or an animal. Yes, I do believe that the perpetrator does not have rational control over his/her actions in violence against another. A pre mediated crime of violence against a particular woman in a specific context is also such a crime. I do appreciate you trying to focus on women and violence against women, but to what extend?

Pressures are breaking backs and there will be a spark, a fight or a crime. I am not justifying crime. I am telling you that it is as natural as the good in world. Do you plan to eradicate Crime? This is a social reality, a problem with roots too deep not a disease with a miracle cure or vaccination. But we can resist violence or we can prevent it! Whose responsibility is it to be the agents of this change? The masses? Men? And out of that only a select few educated-conscious men who are strong enough to act? That’s a dangerously low number friend and being someone who has been there and taken it-am dubious. In a world of all inclusive, why start something exclusive? Are you proposing some distinctive actions that only men can perform and hence you have a separate blog for it? Or is it to make women aware that MEN are suddenly interested in saving us? I only do not understand the purpose of this exclusivity. I could engage further if it was action for all against violence against women!

What I want to suggest is to use preventive methods to aid someone in trouble, (if you are looking for a word of advice from someone who could not tolerate the dark side alone being a single woman, a social worker and having worked for a similar cause in Bundelkhand, Jhansi/Orccha).
  • Give aid to those who cannot help themselves. Make people aware of ‘violence’ and its repercussions to all of us.
  • ‘Mera kya jaata’ attitude will remain until and unless you cannot propose to show that the witnessed action could be curbed with the smallest interference
  • And by removing the fear of that violence being redirected towards the mediator/interferer.
Work towards making the government law enforcement agencies-agents and Social work groups CAPABLE of not only aiding those in need, but doing so keeping in mind that the one seeking aid is the victim requiring consistent counselling and care.

On a personal note, as a teacher my role is to then teach equality in gender and everything in and around it-BECAUSE it is the only source of a uniform, disciplined life skills training available to all. We can campaign, use media and make it known, make people aware of the consequences of their actions and never seize…

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women. More entries to the Blogathon can be read at Join further conversation on &

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